Shaadi.com continued. . . . .
So I clicked on accept. . . .
Now, let me tell you guys something about shaadi.com and all of these dating sites. . . . there are two underlying issues with these websites that even myself am guilty of. . . . . .
#1. There are too many options. Especially at the beginning. When I got on this website, I did a horrible thing. I couldn't remember guys by their names so I'd have to give them all nicknames. Just like I did on this blog. For example, Gujurati Dentist. . . Calm Punjabi. . .etc etc. . . it's horrible, I know! You guys think that I am being nice and I am trying to protect their identity, but in reality I just forgot their names!!!
#2. Everyone is disposable. :( By that I mean. . . . everyone that you talk to is just a voice or just texts on your cell phone. And at any given point in time, you can delete the texts, block the number, and move on to the next. We forget that there is an actual person behind those texts and we don't treat them with the respect that they deserve. . .
So, I clicked on accept. . . and the Canadian Sikh and I started texting. But he was talking to several other girls at once and I am not going to lie, I was talking to a few other guys as well but he had top priority on my list.
Side note: This is just an observation but from what I've seen. . . women really don't like to talk to more than one dude at one time. If we are flooded with 10 new interests, we would rather talk to them one after another than all at the same time. Especially, if we start liking a dude. BUT. . . from what I've seen . . . guys don't think that there is anything wrong with talking to several girls at once and this often causes conflict. . it's just an observation from my end. . . Dudes. . .feel free to correct me if I am wrong. . .
The Canadian Sikh was a gem but one day he told me honestly that he was talking to a few girls in his very own city. I asked him why he wanted to talk to me since I was so far away when he had so many options in his own city. He said he found me attractive and he liked my personality. Whatever. LOL. I knew that eventually he would meet those girls and I would be just another text message. I knew myself and I knew that I wouldn't be okay with this so I told him that I don't think long distance would work and it turned out to be one of the most mature and nicest endings ever. I was growing up!
I then got an interest from a Gujarati Engineer who lived in my city. Oh wow. . my city! Perfect! His profile said that it was made by his mom. This actually made me happy because the mother's approval in a relationship is very important to me. (Please refer to blog #1 lol) He asked me out on a date and I said yes. He looked like a cutie pie in his pictures but there was one thing that I noticed that struck me as odd. . . . he never smiled in any of his pictures! Was he just a serious guy? Was that just how he posed in his pictures? I was about to find out. I met him at a restaurant and when he saw me he smiled wide open. I then realized why he never smiled in his pictures. I wanted to refer him to the Gujarati Dentist from earlier because he sure did need some braces. Don't be superficial and mean I thought to myself! We sat down and he asked me if he could get me a drink. I said water please. He then handed me the wine/alcohol menu. I was like, "uhm, I don't drink, do you?" He said yes. I said his profile said he didn't. He said his mom made the profile. GRRRRRR
He said, "Your Punjabi and you don't drink?" Lord have mercy here we go. . . . . . . I asked him if he sent me the interest or his mom. He said he did. I was like, "Oh" :(
He then said, "Aren't you happy that I chose you, not my mom?"
Ladies and gentlemen, I know that what I am about to say next is extremely conceited and self centered. Please forgive me. This was and is my ego talking. I said, "Honey, I know I can get the guy, it's the mamas I'm worried about . . . ."
Side Note #2: Whatever you are most insecure about in this world will continue to haunt you again and again until you overcome your insecurity. I'll elaborate more on this later. . . . .(but you all can plainly see what my insecurity has been!)
He gave me that smile again that. (Too bad I deleted the dentist's phone number, I could have really given him a referral) We then went to a coffee shop. We had a nice little conversation. Here are some highlights that I kept on noticing over and over again. Whenever I was on a date with a Hindu and whenever the topic of our religions came up, they would always tell me that they have Sikh friends or a Sikh coworker as a way to connect to me. But guys and girls, can I tell you a little secret? Every single time this happened, I wanted to say, "Oh really? Can you hook me up with your Sikh friend or Sikh coworker?"
Alas, the heart knows what it wants. . . . .
And then I made another interesting observation. . . . I asked him if he went to the Mandir (Hindu Temple for my non-indian readers). He said no. He was from India. He had been here for several years but he didn't go the Mandir? I cannot speak for every Sikh but for myself and for many many of my friends, whenever we go to a new city, whether it be on a vacation or whether it be a permanent move, the first place we go to is Gurudwara! I was really surprised to see that the younger Hindu community really wasn't "into" going to their temples. They are gorgeous also! Ironically, the Hindu guys that I had been on dates with did ironically all go to Gurudwara. . . . all for the same thing. Lungar!
During our conversation, I sipped my coffee and some of my lipstick came off on the lid. The Gujarati engineer said, "Oh look, your lipstick came off on that lid, I am so jealous of your coffee cup right now. I wish I was the lid."
Pause. Please. Pause while I throw up . . . .
Normally, that comment deserves a drink thrown in his face. But I felt a little sorry for him. Kind of like Raj from the Big Bang Theory. I knew in that moment I would never see him again. I quickly finished my coffee and threw the cup away.
I went home and returned to a message from a Sikh Motorcyclist in Washington. He was two hours behind me. He asked me how my day was going. At first I said, alright. But then I decided to be honest. I said, "I'm not gonna lie. I just came back from a date."
He asked, "How was it?"
I said, "It was okay . . . . "
He said, "That bad, huh?"
That was the first time I smiled that night. . . .
P.S. See the scared look in the white dog's eyes? That's me fearful of ending up with the wrong life partner!!! How would you caption this picture?
Now, let me tell you guys something about shaadi.com and all of these dating sites. . . . there are two underlying issues with these websites that even myself am guilty of. . . . . .
#1. There are too many options. Especially at the beginning. When I got on this website, I did a horrible thing. I couldn't remember guys by their names so I'd have to give them all nicknames. Just like I did on this blog. For example, Gujurati Dentist. . . Calm Punjabi. . .etc etc. . . it's horrible, I know! You guys think that I am being nice and I am trying to protect their identity, but in reality I just forgot their names!!!
#2. Everyone is disposable. :( By that I mean. . . . everyone that you talk to is just a voice or just texts on your cell phone. And at any given point in time, you can delete the texts, block the number, and move on to the next. We forget that there is an actual person behind those texts and we don't treat them with the respect that they deserve. . .
So, I clicked on accept. . . and the Canadian Sikh and I started texting. But he was talking to several other girls at once and I am not going to lie, I was talking to a few other guys as well but he had top priority on my list.
Side note: This is just an observation but from what I've seen. . . women really don't like to talk to more than one dude at one time. If we are flooded with 10 new interests, we would rather talk to them one after another than all at the same time. Especially, if we start liking a dude. BUT. . . from what I've seen . . . guys don't think that there is anything wrong with talking to several girls at once and this often causes conflict. . it's just an observation from my end. . . Dudes. . .feel free to correct me if I am wrong. . .
The Canadian Sikh was a gem but one day he told me honestly that he was talking to a few girls in his very own city. I asked him why he wanted to talk to me since I was so far away when he had so many options in his own city. He said he found me attractive and he liked my personality. Whatever. LOL. I knew that eventually he would meet those girls and I would be just another text message. I knew myself and I knew that I wouldn't be okay with this so I told him that I don't think long distance would work and it turned out to be one of the most mature and nicest endings ever. I was growing up!
I then got an interest from a Gujarati Engineer who lived in my city. Oh wow. . my city! Perfect! His profile said that it was made by his mom. This actually made me happy because the mother's approval in a relationship is very important to me. (Please refer to blog #1 lol) He asked me out on a date and I said yes. He looked like a cutie pie in his pictures but there was one thing that I noticed that struck me as odd. . . . he never smiled in any of his pictures! Was he just a serious guy? Was that just how he posed in his pictures? I was about to find out. I met him at a restaurant and when he saw me he smiled wide open. I then realized why he never smiled in his pictures. I wanted to refer him to the Gujarati Dentist from earlier because he sure did need some braces. Don't be superficial and mean I thought to myself! We sat down and he asked me if he could get me a drink. I said water please. He then handed me the wine/alcohol menu. I was like, "uhm, I don't drink, do you?" He said yes. I said his profile said he didn't. He said his mom made the profile. GRRRRRR
He said, "Your Punjabi and you don't drink?" Lord have mercy here we go. . . . . . . I asked him if he sent me the interest or his mom. He said he did. I was like, "Oh" :(
He then said, "Aren't you happy that I chose you, not my mom?"
Ladies and gentlemen, I know that what I am about to say next is extremely conceited and self centered. Please forgive me. This was and is my ego talking. I said, "Honey, I know I can get the guy, it's the mamas I'm worried about . . . ."
Side Note #2: Whatever you are most insecure about in this world will continue to haunt you again and again until you overcome your insecurity. I'll elaborate more on this later. . . . .(but you all can plainly see what my insecurity has been!)
He gave me that smile again that. (Too bad I deleted the dentist's phone number, I could have really given him a referral) We then went to a coffee shop. We had a nice little conversation. Here are some highlights that I kept on noticing over and over again. Whenever I was on a date with a Hindu and whenever the topic of our religions came up, they would always tell me that they have Sikh friends or a Sikh coworker as a way to connect to me. But guys and girls, can I tell you a little secret? Every single time this happened, I wanted to say, "Oh really? Can you hook me up with your Sikh friend or Sikh coworker?"
Alas, the heart knows what it wants. . . . .
And then I made another interesting observation. . . . I asked him if he went to the Mandir (Hindu Temple for my non-indian readers). He said no. He was from India. He had been here for several years but he didn't go the Mandir? I cannot speak for every Sikh but for myself and for many many of my friends, whenever we go to a new city, whether it be on a vacation or whether it be a permanent move, the first place we go to is Gurudwara! I was really surprised to see that the younger Hindu community really wasn't "into" going to their temples. They are gorgeous also! Ironically, the Hindu guys that I had been on dates with did ironically all go to Gurudwara. . . . all for the same thing. Lungar!
During our conversation, I sipped my coffee and some of my lipstick came off on the lid. The Gujarati engineer said, "Oh look, your lipstick came off on that lid, I am so jealous of your coffee cup right now. I wish I was the lid."
Pause. Please. Pause while I throw up . . . .
Normally, that comment deserves a drink thrown in his face. But I felt a little sorry for him. Kind of like Raj from the Big Bang Theory. I knew in that moment I would never see him again. I quickly finished my coffee and threw the cup away.
I went home and returned to a message from a Sikh Motorcyclist in Washington. He was two hours behind me. He asked me how my day was going. At first I said, alright. But then I decided to be honest. I said, "I'm not gonna lie. I just came back from a date."
He asked, "How was it?"
I said, "It was okay . . . . "
He said, "That bad, huh?"
That was the first time I smiled that night. . . .
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