Gurudwara. . . .I Love You

So, before I go into date #3. . . . I went to Gurudwara yesterday. I went on a Sunday after a very long time. And, what I have to say is. . .OMG so much love.

If I ever complain about my community, if I ever say anything even remotely negative about them, please note for the record. . . I love them. My community is like my family. They do things to upset me and hurt me but its only because I am so close to them and its because I sometimes expect so much from them. There are common traits and characteristics in every community that can be a bit unhealthy at times, sometimes more than others in different ways, but at the end of the day there is still love and that's all that matters.

I probably speak the absolute worst Punjabi in the history of mankind (or womankind in my case!). But, my community doesn't care! The same Aunties and Uncles who thoroughly upset me at times absolutely love me. The Bhaisahibs (the priests) asked me where I had disappeared to for so long. I said, I don't know but I will keep coming back. There is one Gurudwara committee member who always puts his hand on my head to give me blessings every time I see him. I don't even have words to explain how I feel when I get his blessings. I would give my life for those blessings. . . .

While I was eating lungar, one of the Aunties said to me, "Where have you been? We need more khalsas over here!" I thought to myself. . .really? She thinks I am a khalsa (a pure one)? I am not an amritdhari (a baptized Sikh). I wear makeup and I'm extremely silly and goofy. But I was honored and humbled and I told her that I will keep on coming back. . . .

Also, for the record please note. . . .whatever stupid things I say on here, whatever foolish, or immature things I post. . .please remember. . .that is all from my artificial self. Most of these date blogs are probably purely artificial. But that's the constant struggle of life. . . balancing the artificial self with the inner self. Whatever good I have within me. . .whatever intelligent, reasonable, calm, or beautiful aspect of me. . .I owe that all to my Guru. I owe it to my inner self that listens to my Guru. And for that reason, I will always return to the Gurudwara and I will always return to my community.

Perhaps that is the reason for why I couldn't get into a relationship with just anyone despite how many good qualities they have. If my future significant other doesn't know or understand or relate to my Sikhi, I won't be able to connect. On that same note, on that same token, even if a man is born as a Sikh and he doesn't understand or feel or connect to Sikhi, even he will not connect to me.

So, what happened to Date #3!? Who was he? Where was he from? Where did we meet? And how did it go? Inquiring minds want to know! Stay tuned. . . . ;)

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